At last! First and foremost, my sincere apologies for ignoring my precious reader communty for such a long time. I am leaving for Turkey tomorrow for 4 weeks!!!! The real news, however, is that I quit my job as a research analyst! I would love to explain the details, but I will do it with those I meet face to face-blogsphere is kind of too impersonal for me-in a nuthsell, my manager and the company created a series of problems related to my vacation request, which led to my resignation letter. Kind of sad, but the way things have been going the last two months, I was expecting it. It took me two minutes' time to make the decision, and for the first time in five months, I feel liberated. And anxious about my future. But anxiety is a feeling I have been living with for years.
Also, the only person I was considering as a friend in DC-or a potential friend- is leaving for Sudan in a month-she has been assigned as the town planner for a post-conflict city in Nairobi.
This is becoming a patterns now. In Kansas City, I had Tracy, but I had to move to DC. In Dc, I met Natalie, but she is moving away befor I even got to know her. I am not despairing. I have been admitted to the on-degree program of George Mason University in DC, I will be taking a PH.D level class for the summer term!
This summer will be a long an exciting one for me-I am planning to go to Latin America with Kotmish. Also, I have been reading a travel book that inspired me to be a freelance journalist covering stories for the Turkish press- not sure if this will work, but I will give it a try. I am realizing slowly and painfully that one has got to do what they feel they are meant to do I owe this vital realization, and so many other ideas I didn't have before-to my ex-job. The job itself did not teach anything in the technical sense. But I learned a lot about corporate America and business, and how things are done here-and I was surprized to see that the major problems are not performance related, but person-related! I feel a little wiser, and upbeat. I also learned how precious freedom is-before I had to resign, I had to argue with my boss for five minutes, or take a written approval for 2 hours that I was going to compensate anyway-and e would not approve the request....So, now that I do not feel that pressure, I am only beginning to realize that I can only be happy if I find a way to make a living with a vocation tat makes me feel useful, without compromising my self-esteem. This is going to happen sooner or later, when I have legal status in he US, or in Turkey.